Stockings are hung by the chimney with care and the tree is trimmed from top to trunk, but some Pleasanton homes will still not be complete this Christmas. For some, it’s the call of duty. Others chase the thrill of adventure. Whatever the reason, many local residents are serving abroad in the United States armed forces.
Being gone for the holidays is a challenge, but it’s also difficult for those left behind. With loved ones far away, Pleasanton residents have been feverishly working for months to extend holiday cheer to those in Iraq and Afghanistan. Groups like Pleasanton Military Families (PMF), made up of mostly parents of service men and women, and Livermore-based Operation SAM (Supporting All Military) have put together over 1,790 care packages to the troops.
PMF chairman Chris Miller started the support group in March 2003. At that time they met each week, but now they gather the first Tuesday of each month. His motivation to support troops and their families came from his experience returning from service in Vietnam.
“When I got out of the Army, I lived in San Francisco and got to see the harsh, unfriendly treatment that the returning member o f the U.S. armed forces who had served in Vietnam sadly were receiving from their fellow Americans,” the retired lieutenant colonel said. “I vowed at that time if I could ever do some good to support armed forces personnel involved in future conflicts in a positive and caring manner, that I would do so and have done so.”
Miller also has two sons who are tech sergeants in the USAF Reserve on their second active duty tour in Iraq and Afghanistan.
At a Nov. 28 meeting, about 36 PMF members stuffed boxes with socks, games, candy, letters and tree decorations. They have a few “packouts” over the year, but Miller says the holiday packing is the best. Each service man or woman on the list is sent about three boxes so he or she can share them with the unit. Someone even donated 18 3-foot trees and three cases of Santa hats.
“Plain and simple, you’re away from home and you get a package from someone you know or you don’t, but you can see heart and home when you open the packages,” Miller said at the meeting. “It’s amazing what you guys do.”
Pat Frizzell, a PMF co-chair, said the items in the packages are what Americans have grown to enjoy about special celebrations.
“Just imagine being in a war zone with none of that familiar fun around you when the holiday comes along,” she said. “Of course their fellow Marines and soldiers become their family for a time, but still, it’s not the same.”
“We have lots of fun going to the party shops, Wal-Mart and Target looking for just the right seasonal things to include,” she added. “Last year we even found and filled camouflage-print plastic Easter eggs!”
The packouts are a labor of love for volunteers and often giving also means receiving something in return. Just being a part of PMF has helped parents cope with the absence of their child, such as Sherry Wiggins with her son Alan, a 19-year-old lance corporal in the Marine Corps. This will be Wiggin’s first Christmas without him, which she said makes the empty nest seem that much lonelier. Alan was deployed in September with the 15th MEU (Marine Expeditionary Unit) based in Camp Pendleton, Calif. The unit was originally headed on a six-month deployment to Hawaii, Singapore and India, but plans changed and they were sent to Iraq.
“It was a bit of a shock; something we weren’t expecting,” Wiggins said. But the news was easier to take when she found PMF and discovered a group that put her at ease despite the uncertainty.
“I almost got the feeling of family right away,” she said. “They’re such a warm group of people that they make you feel like family when you’re almost a complete stranger.
“There’s a great mix of folks. You have the whole gamut of different family criterions. We have that one bond, but we also respect the fact that (their loved ones) are doing what they want to do.”
PMF gathers the first Tuesday of the month at a local Pleasanton home to share stories and updates, laughter and sometimes tears. It’s a unique group that was brought together by a common bond, held together by hope and support.
Frizzell joined after her son Cpl. David Frizzell, a 1998 Amador Valley High School graduate, was sent to Iraq in April 2003.
“I was a worried wreck and was looking for a support group to talk to–someone who would understand what I was feeling,” she said.
And that’s exactly what she found.
“Being a part of the group helped me realize I was not alone. There were many parents feeling the same way–proud, worries, afraid, anxious, unable to turn off the news during those first weeks and months of the war,” she said.
Just as the group focuses on supporting those at home, they’ve always been active in supporting those abroad.
“(The troops) are always so grateful to be remembered and seem to enjoy any food treat, clothing, books, letters and ‘toys’ we send them,” Frizzell said. “Sometimes in a ‘thank you’ letter they will tell us about men and women in their platoon who do not receive letters or packages. We do our best to include these kids the next time we pack boxes. Mail call is the highlight of their day.”
At the November packout, one group member mentioned an orphan in her son’s unit who wasn’t receiving any mail and another member quickly chimed in, “well now he’ll have more parents than he’ll ever want!”
Sharon Carroll has been involved for about two years and loves the support she gets from PMF. Her son Clayton is a corporal in the Army who’s on his second tour in his third year of service. One of her favorite parts of being in the group is receiving e-mail updates from the Pleasanton troops.
“You hear about positive things you don’t hear on the news,” she said. “You feel like you’re connected. We’re hearing it firsthand. It’s good to hear the positive stuff. I really look forward to their e-mails.”
Carroll is also grateful to be part of a city that supports the troops, as can be seen in the form of yellow streamers hanging from Main Street lampposts with the names of service members inscribed on them. In fact, the city and organizations often team up with PMF, including the police department, which decided to extend its holiday charitable contributions this year and give $1,000 to help pay the postage for the holiday packages sent overseas. Foothill High School senior Nick Christian organized “March for the Troops” and raised more than $2,500 for PMF to also help cover care postage costs.
The Pleasanton Weekly keeps those abroad in touch with the local news by sending troops copies of the newspaper each week.
Carroll said that’s one of Clayton’s favorite pieces of mail because “it’s a piece of home in itself.”
PMF co-chair Tracey Buescher was with the group since the beginning. Her husband, Marine Corps Col. Chris Buescher, is an American Airlines pilot who is in the reserves doing emergency preparedness. Last year, he was activated for two weeks to help with Hurricane Katrina. But in 2003, he was deployed to Iraq, and Tracey was home with her two young daughters.
“The girls really missed him, the older one especially,” she said. “She was old enough to understand and was very scared and frightened. There were many nights of tears. It was tough and I couldn’t have done it without Pleasanton Military Families and the entire community was overwhelmingly supportive.”
In November, she organized a packout in her daughter Olivia’s sixth-grade block classroom. Earlier in the year, Chris showed the class a PowerPoint presentation with his pictures of Iraqi people smiling with soldiers. Teacher Amber Burak also wanted to help combat all the negative exposure of the war by having students write letters to the troops.
The presentation had quite an impact. Student Niki Mohebi said that she always gets excited to get mail, so sending the packages were just one way to show her appreciation. Some said they felt guilty for the people sacrificing their lives, and others wanted to help because they’ve had family and friends in the military.
“They’re very privileged and I think they lose sight of that,” Tracey said. “And we as parents lose sight of that. It’s good to get them proactive so they can realize how privileged they are.
“It’s not a political statement for or against the war. It’s simply supporting the troops and boosting their morale. It’s frustrating for (Chris) being over there with all the good they’re doing and never hearing about it in the media.”
Penny Redmond is a co-founder of Operation SAM, which sent 1,709 holiday packages this year. With a packout every other week, in 2006 they were able to send 11,200 boxes to local service members including those in casualty hospitals in Afghanistan and Baghdad. Redmond, who doesn’t have any family in the military herself, works nonstop for the group and said even with those numbers they “don’t seem to make a dent sometimes.”
Yet, community organizations and local schools made quite an impact this season, writing 6,000 cards.
“This year we had incredible support from the community,” she said. “Normally our packages have two letters. This year every box had three. They’re great and so much fun to read. They are all messages of encouragement and come in all different spellings.”
Alan Wiggins also enjoys reading the cards with creative spelling.
“Alan has told me that the letters they get from school kids are the most fun,” Sherry Wiggins said. “For him, just seeing the Pleasanton address and somebody writing from schools he’s familiar with, that’s his favorite part.”
He also tells his mom he’s seeing the increased community support. He receives things from several organizations and has been inundated with gifts. While there is not much room for his unit to keep many personal items, they love having the footballs, baseballs and other gift items to use in their limited off time. PMF has already received lots of e-mail and letters thanking the group and the community for thinking of them during the holidays.
While PMF members come and go as loved ones fulfill their service, the spirit of giving back remains as many plan to keep the support going.
“I’d be right there to help,” Carroll said. “There are going to be more families joining and I’d like to think that once my son is home that I would continue to be involved.”
For Tracey Buescher, remaining active comes out of appreciation and duty.
“We’ve been there and know what it’s like,” she said. “We know that feeling in the pit of your stomach 24/7, not knowing if they’re safe. We want to help other families and to continue to support the troops.”
Christmas in Iraq
The holidays are hard for soldiers in general, but it’s even harder when deployed overseas. We all miss our families and we wish we could be home for the holidays. That’s why here on FOB Prosperity we have our MWR (Morale Welfare and Recreation) facility, which is run by civilians. They make us feel “at home” as much as possible. We have a phone center to call our families and an Internet area with Web cams so we can see our loved ones.Of course we also have a nice tree located in the entrance of the MWR. The Dinning Facility makes a big dinner for the soldiers and they dress up in costumes. After dinner all the younger, single soldiers have a party put together by the Chaplain. In my company we have a secret Santa drawing and exchange presents on Christmas Eve. Around this time people usually start receiving care packages from their families and loved ones.
My unit is very grateful to have all these things, the soldiers outside of our green zone aren’t so lucky. To them, Christmas is just another day. Unfortunately, to some, depending on their family situation, Christmas is just another day here as well. We all try to help each other keep up morale by driving forward; taking it day by day and keeping our heads up to make it back safely so we can be home for the next Christmas.
–Jessica Brogden, 1st Calvary Divisin, 4/9 2BDE. She was deployed to Iraq from Ft. Hood, Texas in October.
Getting involved
Pleasanton Military FamiliesA support group meeting the first Tuesday of every month at a Pleasanton home. For information, call Chris Miller at 730-1604.Operation SAM
A Livermore-based non-profit organization that mails care packages year-round to troops deployed all over the world. Visit www.operationsam.org, e-mail operationsam@comcast.net, or call Penny Redmond at 443-7620.
Yellow StreamersThe names and locations of service men and women are represented on yellow streamers adorning the flagpoles lining Main Street. Families generally buy two, so they can also hang one at home. To put in an order, call Chris Miller at 730-1604 or e-mail him at millercj3@comcast.net.
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