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Instant human: just add coffee

Original post made by Sierra Rhodes, Pleasanton Valley, on Sep 13, 2013

I am not a morning person. I don't spring out of bed with bright eyes or bushy tail, ready for the day with a spring in my step and a song in my heart. No, I remove myself from bed in a process similar to scraping gum off asphalt.

Prior to my morning coffee, I am a creature of terrifying visage and unspeakable cruelty. Those who would wish me 'good morning' receive a cranky snipe or a groan that would make horror-movie mummies tremble in their wraps.

And then there is coffee. This wonderful elixir ushers me into the day, transforming me from monster to human in a magical wave that is uncomfortably reminiscent of the Beast's transformation in "Beauty and the Beast." I am reborn, able to face the day and return sincerity to my smile.

But beware -- should you catch me before the caffeine has taken effect, approach at your own risk.

Comments (1)

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Posted by Ishmael
a resident of Another Pleasanton neighborhood
on Sep 13, 2013 at 3:20 pm

I drink coffee all the time. It tastes good. But not for everybody.


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