January 07, 2005

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Publication Date: Friday, January 07, 2005

Not your typical trainer

Mary Pauer believes that you are much more than your physical body.

That philosophy might seem strange coming from a fitness trainer - the type of person you'd envision flaunting a toned, spandex-clad body while pushing her clients to "make it burn," forcing that extra crunch in pursuit of perfect washboard abs.

But Pauer is not your typical "crunch and burn" trainer. In fact, there is nothing at all typical about Pauer, her clients, or why she chose this vocation.

Three years ago, the then 49-year-old wife, mother and mortgage broker was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease, a chronic brain disorder that impairs the coordination of the body's muscles and movement. Because Parkinson's is progressive, those with the disease typically experience gradual deterioration of the use of their bodies.

"When I was diagnosed, I was devastated," says Pauer. She feared being doomed to a life of physical disability and emotional pain.

But instead of taking the diagnosis lying down, she decided to literally get up and do something about it.

"My friends, John and Kristi owned Body Balance (a training and massage facility in downtown Pleasanton) so I started coming here to train," says Pauer. "I had always worked out, but I decided to become dedicated to fitness and make my body as strong as possible."

The fitness training made such a difference in Pauer's life that she decided to quit mortgage brokerage and make fitness her full-time vocation. She became a certified personal trainer with the mission to help others - especially those with chronic illnesses.

"It is my dream to have those who may have given up hope of having a 'normal life' redefine themselves and reclaim their power," says Pauer.

Pleasanton resident Dina Pann is one of Pauer's clients. Ten years ago Pann was diagnosed with NF2 (neurofibromatoses), a genetic disorder that causes tumors to grow on key nerves in the body. Pann has undergone seven surgeries, including the removal of a brain tumor in January.

Pann watched her mother, who also had NF2, become immobilized and live the last years of her life in a wheelchair.

"I've had doctors say, 'Look at your mom. You're going to be just like her.' But I decided I'm not going to be like her," says Pann.

A friend told Pann about Pauer and the two began training in June. Pann's doctors did not encourage exercise - and some had strongly advised against it - but Pann was determined to make her body as strong as possible to fend off the effects of the disease. The results have been much more than she expected.

"My left leg is stronger than it's ever been," says Pann, who was a dedicated runner before her diagnosis. "Lots of doctors said, 'You have this disease and there's nothing you can do. Just go home, go to bed and take medication.' But I refused to believe that."

Tumors on her spinal cord caused Pann to lose her sense of balance.

"Since November 1994, I couldn't walk a straight line," says Pann. "The doctors said I would never be able to. I told Mary I couldn't do it, and she said, 'Yes, you can.' We did some balance exercises and I went home and practiced and practiced, and now I can do it. It's something I should have learned a long time ago."

Pann trains with Pauer twice a week, doing a variety of cardio, weights and other exercises. She also works out twice a week on her own at home. Her strength has increased incredibly and she has gained two inches of muscle on her leg.

But the benefits have been more than just physical.

"This has really cut down on my stress level," says Pann. "When I first came here, I was so depressed. Every person who has an illness - especially if it's chronic - you get depressed."

"When people (who have chronic illnesses) stay at home and don't get out, their feelings of depression get exacerbated," says Pauer. "Just to get out helps. I know when my own body isn't working right, it helps me to exercise. I feel proud of myself and it makes me feel better."

Pann finds working out with someone who also has a chronic disease very comforting.

"Mary understands me because some of the things that are happening to my body are parallel to what's happening to her," says Pann. "There is an acceptance."

"It is a vocabulary without words," adds Pauer and the look that passes between the two women clearly demonstrates a deep bond that goes beyond the typical trainer/client relationship.

In addition to physical training, Pauer, who has a master's degree in social work, also coaches on an emotional and spiritual level. She has clients with Parkinson's, cancer and depression, whom she coaches both in person and by phone.

Pauer believes that embracing empowering beliefs is an important part of healing.

"Remember when I asked you if there was anything positive that has come out of your disease?" Pauer asks Pann.

Pann closes her eyes and nods.

"I don't like what I have, but there's not a thing I can do about it," says Pann. "But I'm a better person, far better than I was before. I have faced a lot of struggles and I could have just given up, but I have a strong will."

Pauer chooses to focus on the blessings of her own circumstances.

"The gift (of Parkinson's) is that I have done so much work inside," she says. "And I get to meet people like Dina."

And inspire them to realize their own strengths of all types - physical, emotional and spiritual.

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