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Take a listen to Philip Philips song, “Unpack Your Heart.”

We Want to be Known

Most of us, at heart, want to be truly known, accepted, and loved as we are. And we may fear being known with all of our shadows and uncertainties, thoughts, feelings, life experiences, and scars. We also have our own light to shine, that no other person can do.

This song invites us to show up as we are, accepted and healed by our relationship with our beloved. Of course, “Unpack Your Heart” doesn’t allude to how much work that might be!

We May be Afraid to be Known

And we can heal in relationship, especially since most of our wounding came from relationship, whether in our early or adult years.

It may be difficult when we begin to learn of our beloved’s authentic inner self and what is most hidden. Yet, we all have scars.

These are our opportunities to grow and become more intimate as a couple, even if they are not easy instances.

I read a quote recently in which a man said of his wife that he was attracted to her for a certain trait she had that he didn’t have; but then didn’t realize just how much of that trait he would get from her. This is common.

I invite you to think about your heart, what’s been unpacked already, and what’s still packed. Are you ready to unpack your heart with your love?

About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple,...

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