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A friend of mine was getting discouraged about the online dating scene. He’d been on many dates, met a lot of interesting people, met a few “duds,” (okay, a lot of them), met some women who came close, but not her.

I told him, “Remember, she’s on the other end of the thread, looking for you, too.” That seemed to offer a little relief.

The search continued: a woman who was the closest yet, but too many red flags (you know what I mean).

He was going to give it up, but decided to give it one last try, and expand the geographic area. He got one email from her. They went on a date. Now they are married and have a baby.

I have heard a similar story from several people.

So don’t lose hope. Know what your must-haves are. Know what your must-not-haves are. Stick to them, especially your must-not-haves.

Keep going.

S/he’s on the other end of the thread, looking for you, too.

About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple,...

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