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If ‘News’ Media were Animals

Original post made by Douglas Kendall, Downtown, on Oct 22, 2009

MATT DRUDGE -- Rabid Doberman Pincher, wearing a fedora, and often found playing poker in a smoky back room with Rush Limbaugh (large St. Bernard with small Swiss rescue barrel tied to his collar, full of emergency Viagrowl), with Sean Hannity (big, chocolate Labrador retriever with a dead duck dangling from his maw), with Bill O’Reilly (an Irish wolfhound flanked by several comely bitches), and Glenn Beck (vicious little Maltese -- in need of a trim) with Michael Savage (a miniature, beady-eyed dachshund) outside angrily scratching at the door trying to get in, but none of the others want him at the table (they claim that he cheats; but are in actual fact intimidated by his many pHd’s, his towering IQ -- all exacerbated by his being constantly high on ROCKSTAR -- a dachshund on energy drinks! Yikes!!).

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