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Community Goes to War over Yearbook Photo

Original post made by Marvin on Dec 11, 2012

It has been an awful several days of contentious debate for the Pleasanton community. On one side has been the Authoritarians who can see no possible virtue emanating from an unruly teen's grotesque fake face painting and nose ring. This pot smoking teen, they argue, will never measure up to the standards of the private (corporate) sector which, they argue, having all of society's dough, has a right to define proper decorum in appearance any way it wants to. If one can't get a private sector job because of one's appearance, well then one is simply a miserable failure in life. Worse, unable to charm any corporate personnel director with one's fake facial tattoo, one is likely to end up sucking tax dollars from the decent, CEO-fearing among us, and therefore become a Democrat. Or a public school teacher.

On the other side are the fearless Libertarians who argue that it is the wayward teen's right to tattoo his face albeit it might have been better received had it been the curly red-white-and-blue R in the front of 'money' -- make that 'omney' -- that rallied so many true patriots during the final apocalyptic days of our most recent election. For this is an individualist community that has sanctified the right of all individuals, from Sam Walton and sibs possessing more wealth than 40% of the population; to their high-tech surveillance of minimum wage Walmart workers attempting to organize into cursed unions; to their God-given right to hire out subcontractors whose deplorable factory conditions lead to thousands of deaths annually by fire, by hunger, by suicide (for, after all, those dead workers weren't coerced into working there, right?).

But of what import colonization of the lifeworld where all appearance and consumer habits are forced into corporate-molded taste and 'self' expression? Of what import the annoying deaths of foreigners who really just don't appreciate liberty like we do? No, let us search every nook and cranny in our efforts to learn more of the class dolt's noxious behaviors. They say in 1st grade he once wore his pj's under his school clothes, in fifth grade he kissed a girl on the playground (investigation of the girl's intention still pending, though gossip queens throughout the community are leaving no possible interpretation unturned), and that he has two -- two I tell you -- fillings on the left side of his mouth.

Is it too late to call in the Nat'l Guard to quell this battle? Oh, you say a request has been put in already? Oh, so say the gossip queens? The war continues!

Comments (35)

Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 11, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Rumor has it according to one of our rumor queens that the ACLU is going to, um, bubble up -- yes, bubble up [that's journalism, folks] -- and whine that new aerial spy-drones with special smoke detectors were essential to the arrest of the criminal snicklefritz who thought he'd attempt to spare his lungs by smoking smooth, concentrated hash as opposed to harsh, cough-inducing marijuana.

Since hashish is a felony, it's use along with other drugs is a contributor to nearly 1/2 of all maximum security prisoners in the Cal penitentiary system who have been convicted of felony drug possession -- defined by our criminal justice system as a 'violent crime' that warrants putting young guys like Kenton in with the likes of Manson and Gotti. Ah, but I digress.... For my main reason for contributing this has been to keep the topic 'current'. And to feel important.

Sincerely yours, Marvin


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 11, 2012 at 8:29 pm

It has been stated that other kids in Pleasanton smoke hashish also and that some were planning on getting their ears pierced. I'll look for the link.... Stay tuned, Marv


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 11, 2012 at 10:38 pm

Haven't found the link yet. I'll keep trying. Marv


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 7:30 am

Okay, I still haven't found the link yet. But I've heard it from at least one reliable source, and so shouldn't that be good enough for this forum? Look, this kid going rogue in front of the photographer indicates huge problems, starting with ear piercing and "evolving" to the need for drones surveillance of democratic crowds. But worse, there are evil ACLU bubbles resting at the bottom of the swamp just waiting for tattoos and such because that's what they do. They bubble up and then whine about ridiculous things. Like civil rights. Which I know all about because I was a sociology major.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:50 am

YOU HEARD IT FIRST UPDATE:

I have polled two of my neighbors this morning. One on them says that based on the rumors she's heard, the kid is a bad egg who will never make it in Corporate America but, indeed, it is stated that these types of kids usually bleed us all during the lifelong stints in prison. The other one who, it has been stated is a product of no hands-on parenting, thinks the kid is okay. "Just okay?" I asked. To which she rejoined: "That's what some ACLU bubble guy told me at a meeting involving use of drones to capture pot smokers in our city parks."

Stay tuned for more updates oh loyal readers!


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 11:21 am

There's a rumor out there, I don't know how valid it is, but the gist of it is that there is a deep rift between the Authoritarians and the Libertarians in Pleasanton, and that it may lead to cancellation of next spring's Tea Party hoe-down hootinanny. "This past year there were only 17 participants," Jimbo Freeman from Tracey was quoted as saying. He continues: "With the split among Republican Libertarians and Authoritarians in the region, we'll likely not have enough for a gathering with double figures. KFC won't make party reservations unless you can guarantee a party of at least 10." Consensus is that both sides wish the great yearbook scandal had not occurred; but since it has, there is no pulling away from it. This kid deserves all the attention he is getting!


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 11:37 am

RECENT UPDATE:

The failure to reach consensus has the Authoritarians wanting Kenton to spend the rest of his life in jail because, frankly, he deserves it and so do his parents.

The Libertarians, stuck on their original defense of the criminal lad, and now faced with having to defend a heinous felon who "allegedly" smokes hashish which is way stronger than marijuana but not quite as strong as crack cocaine, are urging at least a reduced prison term. As for his parents, being pilloried on Main St. should suffice. Because we are a free society.

No word yet on how this will affect future Tea Party activities.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 11:58 am

NEWS FLASH This just in!!!

Rumor has it that Kenton's High School has issued a mandatory recall of the yearbook. The school intends to put RED Letters across Kenton's picture which reads: "ALLEGED" FELON HASHISH POSSESSOR

Below the picture will read: This misfit subversive was found guilty by the community because it refused to believe someone so disrespectful of the Corporate Look might be innocent until a trial proved otherwise.

More comin' atcha! Marv


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 1:40 pm

MID-AFTERNOON NEWS EXCLUSIVE:

Very credible sources it is said have now revealed that Pleasanton's finest citizens have compiled a list of Kenton's friends and have forwarded them to the police. A spokesperson for the PPD has confirmed that as we speak drones are hovering over the city with special hashish detection devices that will lead to the criminal indictment of at least 26 teens in the city of Pleasanton. Moreover, no exhonoration of the culprits will be permitted. It is the law!


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 4:45 pm

NEWS BREAK; FAIR AND BALANCED UPDATE

It has been stated that among the 26 of Kenton's friends who were busted, several have confessed to setting up and operating a hash lab in a backyard of Ruby Hill. Hashish, stronger than marijuana, but not as strong as marijuana buds, has never lived up to its potential. But the not yet convicted but guilty nevertheless friends of Kenton intimidated that they had developed ways of converting the heinous, mind-altering, life-destroying hashish into an injectable form that can be mainlined straight into the user's vein. Had it reached the public, it might have been experimented upon Pleasanton's kindergarten population.

Pleasanton's Chief of Police - the one with the exorbitant salary that everyone knows he doesn't deserve (oh, wait till it's HIS turn!) - has refused to comment on whether this new super variant of hashish needed to be cooked on a spoon before being injected. One anonymous source, however, stated that hashish dealers in the city had found devious ways of using a microwave oven. More as this story develops.... Marv


Posted by Frank, a resident of Del Prado
on Dec 12, 2012 at 5:17 pm

Marvin. Serenity now. Serenity now. take a yoga class. Breath.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 5:26 pm

Thank you, Frank, for your keen analytical narration of events and, above all, your spelling lesson.

OPINION-EDITORIAL

Dear Loyal Readers, Now is the time for all good gossiping men and women to come to the aid of their party. Rumor has it that Kathleen Ruegsenegger is sitting on a fence, with pitchfork in hand just to tantalize those of use sitting on pins and needles awaiting her word on whether she will lead our community's great vigilante crusade. One source, it is said, has stated that she will not further publicly denigrate the ingrate criminal Kenton unless an effigy of Luz Ceasares is also thrown onto the pyre.

Marvin is a well-respected contributor to PW Forum


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 7:40 pm

NEWS FLASH:

This just in. Authoritarians, Libertarians, and Aristotelian Chanteliers intend to assemble on Main St. at 9 p.m. this evening in order to offer torch-bearing testimony against the likes of Kenton the hashish manufacturer and Luz Caesares who hides behind her position while bilking Pleasanton millionaires out of hundreds of dollars. The assembly will be led by Kathleen Ruegsinegger who stated to another PW poster, "I'll meet you there, honest." Rumor also has it that Stacey will take time out from her home xmas shopping in order to attend the event. (She'll be the one who looks exactly like Ms. Ruegsinegger.) At stake will be whether to burn effigies of Caesares and the ring-nosed doofus high schooler at the stake or whether, in good Aristotelian fashion, they will be given the choice of either drinking hemlock or slithering out of town. In response to many of your inquiries, no, shoes are definitely not required at the gathering, though authorities have asked that everyone pick up the droppings from their whittle sticks and dispose of them either in trash cans or in the pyre upon which the effigies will be burned.


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:25 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:41 pm

NEWS UPDATE:

You read it first here. Kathleen Ruegsinegger, the classy one that she is, with a rough and tumble double twitch on the submit button, has definitely NOT denied that she'll be leading the assembly tonight on Main Street. Moreover, she has announced on another thread that Luz Caesares can either hold her job or go somewhere else. Further, it is said that Ms. Ruegsinegger stated that she personally doesn't care if Caesares stays or leaves, which many have speculated may be a way of Ms. R. either stating something personally about an impersonal matter or, conversely, stating something impersonally about a personal matter. We continue to attempt to reach Ms. Caesares for a response, but unconfirmed sources tell us she doesn't have time to deal with vigilantism in the community.


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:47 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 8:54 pm

Please stay tuned, as live coverage will be provided of the Assembly of Ptown Vigilantes who are convening shortly to
symbolically cleanse the city of its noxious, sinful tendencies.


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 12, 2012 at 9:08 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 9:38 pm

Apologies for the technical delay.... Since the city has done such a miserable job with cell phone towers, and now with dozens of drones hovering over the city, our ability to wifi from Main St has been seriously compromised.

As for the Assembly of Vigilantes scheduled to meet at 9 pm, it must be objectively reported as being something of a flop. No throngs of angry people, but only a few sad and lonely individuals who appear to be rather out of sorts. One elder woman continues to walk in a circle, repeating "Oh, the irony is so delicious! Oh, the irony is so delicious."

Another elderly woman, slowed by excessive weight, persisted in grabbing my staff supporters by their shirt lapels and shouting, alternately, "Aristotle WAS a libertarian, he was, he was, I tell you!" But then she'd quickly follow with, "Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am?" And this latter was interspersed with a change of voice along with a varying "Do you know who she is? Do you know who she is?"

A desperately forlorn and hateful looking man, carrying a tattered Confederate flag, seemed confused as he bellowed "I am NO MAD, I am yes MAD, I am NO MAD," and when we asked for his identity all he could muster is "Liberalism is a disease." As I turned away, I caught him studying me, and then he asked: "Are you black or half-black? It matters you know!"

Ah, and then he returned moments later, with a lecherous look about him, and asked if we knew of any kids who needed home schooling.

Finally, a dirty little man who alternated between picking his hairy toes and whittling a stick, asked if we knew about the approaching tsunami. When we expressed our ignorance, he handed each of us a 150-word blog piece, and he said it foretells of the end of the earth, at least as we know it with unions and bloated pensions for public school teachers.

Oh, yes, and then there was this old geezer who insisted he was a journalist. "What scam educational institution are you from," he queried, and before we could respond he began warning us of ACLU whiners bubbling up from cracks in the sidewalk. He then apologized and asked where the golf course was, but he wouldn't let us respond. We said "Have a good evening," and he rejoined with "I didn't hear that, and I couldn't care less whether you have an opinion or not."

And that, I'm sorry to say, is all the Ptown Vigilantes were able to field for their first assembly. Reading the PW Forum pages, one would have thought there'd be many more, but alas, only this sad motley crew appeared.

More after this commercial from our sponsors....


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 12, 2012 at 10:04 pm

ASSEMBLY OF VIGILANTES MAKES ITS MARK, THOUGH MANY CLAIM THE CATHARSIS OF HATRED HAS BEEN INCOMPLETE

The Assembly of Vigilantes met earlier this evening but they were unable to put to rest the bile and venom that induces so many of the half-dozen of so of them to post madly, incessantly, day after day, the same charges. Many now are calling Luz Cesares a liar. It is said she has no real experience with education and that she lied on her Curriculum Vitae while simultaneously using the teachers' union to cast a spell over the school board such that they all never have bothered to check her credentials. "She doesn't have degrees from U of Chicago or Harvard's Kennedy School," exclaimed one poster, with rumors from reliable sources confirming that she merely has a journalism degree from one of the Idaho state universities.

It remains unclear whether Kenton Koos will have his day in court or whether he may have to serve six years without a trial for the gram of hashish planted upon his person. "Sometimes," stated one hate-filled ptown resident, who insists her name is Resident, "community will must prevail over the vagaries of the law." Another monger was reported to have stated, "That oughta teach the nasty little narcissist a lesson or two." When asked about the strain community disapprobation was placing on the little creep's family, several in the community, almost in unison chimed in with "It serves the ACLU lovers right!"

Good night for now, and good luck. Marv


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 6:59 am

SPECIAL NEWS ANALYSIS

It is said that a special "Truthiness" award is being given to Ms. Kathleen Reugsinugger for her candid "drop" into Stacey mode as she called Mad as HECK on another site, and an unnamed source here on this site, a "Disturber" of you know what. For those who need a more graphic depiction: "Disturber" of something stinky that ordinarily deserves to be flushed out into the river.

It is rare when posters have been so "Truthy." And we commend this day's recipient. "It is spot on," admits Mad as HECK. "When I see it in my yard I kick it to the curb," he stated, "and when I see it in front of me in written form, whether preceded by 'bull' or 'horse', I have an overwhelming compulsion to Disturb it." "There is so much of it on this Forum," states an unnamed source on this thread, "and I'm compelled to give it a good hosing." "It's like seeing numerous piles of it in your driveway," he stressed. "My first task, therefore, is to give my driveway a thorough hosing down. Everything then seems less full of untruth, irrationality, ideology, stinky stuff, call it what you may." "That's why I accept the uncouth designation that Ms. Ruegsinubber has so accurately applied to me," the unnamed source went on to say.

Mad as HECK then concluded: "Heck, I'm flattered as HECK to be called a Disturber. What an honor! Do you know who Ruegsinibber or Stacey or whoever she calls herself is?!?!?" And our unnamed source pledged his assurance that whenever faced with stinky stuff, often disguised as untruthfulness or irrationality or unfounded gossip, he'd continue to give it a good "Disturbing." He then called upon others to follow his lead. "When you see it, Disturb it! That is our duty as rational beings!"

And so, with that, we bestow this most prestigious "Truthiness Award" upon our most frequent and truthy poster. Thank you Kathleen or Stacey for your heroic efforts. We commend you. Please carry on!


Posted by Stacey, a resident of Amberwood/Wood Meadows
on Dec 13, 2012 at 9:44 am

Stacey is a registered user.

Pleasanton Weekly, when are you going to put an end to the facilitation of cyberbullying on your website? Clearly, Marvin isn't interested in talking about Kenton beyond using the subject as yet another hook for making personal attacks against Kathleen. Your site has also enabled parties in the Brian Lancaster story to harass each other here. Stop pretending this is some grand experiment in democracy and free speech and mature your site already.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 11:47 am

NEWS BULLETIN

This just in. Stacey, often fondly referred to by PW readers as Staceleen, recovering from the disappointment of last night's Assembly of Vigilantes protest, has upped the ante. It is not enough that we crucify the likes of Kenton Koos or Luz Cazares. Us bullies need also to go after the likes of those wayward ones who defend them. And the best way to do that is to censor anyone who finds Staceleen's views and the way they are expressed to be something of a giggle. To quote Mad as Heck: "On what grounds censor me for being the stinky stuff Disturber that I am?" And another anonymous but highly placed source, who says we can use Disturber as his name, states: "Like I say, when I see a plop on my driveway I take out the hose."

But according to some, which presumably includes the half-dozen stalwarts who attended last evening's bust, it's okay to find people guilty before they are tried and have them sentenced to prison, it's okay to badger ayoung hashish smoker's (allegedly) family with all sorts of gossip and innuendo, it's okay to insinuate that people are drugged up, it's okay to wish the demise of entire groups or populations of people, BUT IT IS NOT OKAY TO LAUGH AT THE RIDICULOUS CLAIMS BEING FORWARDED BY STACELEEN BECAUSE GOSH DARNIT THAT COUNTS AS BULLYING.

Excuse me, my loyal readers, but I must go clean off my shoes after this recent encounter with a queen plopper. I hope we have benefitted from this learning experience.


Posted by Stacey, a resident of Amberwood/Wood Meadows
on Dec 13, 2012 at 12:07 pm

Stacey is a registered user.

I was not on this website last night.

PW, Marvin is NOT here to challenge ideas or claims made by other posters. Marvin has conducted a multi-year effort to cyberbully Kathleen Ruegsegger by actively stalking her posts and making personal comments about her, even on subjects where Kathleen and Marvin have agreement. Marvin is not exercising free speech, but engaging in continuous harassment. It is really sad that you either do not recognize it or recognize it and allow it to continue.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 12:36 pm

STREAMING NEWS

In a highly significant development, Stacey insists she was not on any PW sites last evening. More interesting, however, is her failure to state her whereabouts during the Assembly of Vigilante protests. Without her denial, of course, it makes sense for loyal readers to infer that she was not on the PW sites last evening because she was busy organizing last night's gaggle of gossipers.

It has been stated by one reader, "She may deny it somewhere down the road, but the damage has already been done."

Well, perhaps. But what is now paramount is that we collectively - oops, scratch that, because that's socialism - that we individualistically develop a universal formulation that specifies exactly WHICH sarcastic remarks need to be stricken from the record, WHICH unfounded accusations, WHICH hysterical remonstrations, WHICH anonymous, self-aggrandizing, pseudo coming to the defense of another poster (who suddenly has disappeared) must be deemed credible over others. Yes, that ... and we need to renew the discussion about what Kenton Koos really have coming to them for their call upon the ACLU to whine about the rights of individuals.


Posted by Stacey, a resident of Amberwood/Wood Meadows
on Dec 13, 2012 at 12:38 pm

Stacey is a registered user.

Kathleen,

Speaking of ridiculous claims, did you notice that we happened to post at exactly the same time on this other thread? Web Link

Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of the Vintage Hills Elementary School neighborhood, on Nov 29, 2012 at 11:24 am

Posted by Stacey, a resident of the Amberwood/Wood Meadows neighborhood, on Nov 29, 2012 at 11:24 am

Of course doubt can be sewed that Staceleen somehow logged into two different computers from two different IP addresses from two different service providers and posted at exactly the same time. If that were true, Staceleen would have done it a long time ago, don't you think?


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 13, 2012 at 12:47 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

FACTS:
This call to assembly was your brainchild (as were the torches and burning of effigies).

I supported the student's right to have his photo in the yearbook. There is no post by me where I bashed that person, family, or an entire population of people.

My express concern is increased costs to PUSD and the apparent lack of priorities for students. I have contacted the board and superintendent, and I am waiting for a response regarding a discrepancy.

Stacey is one person.

I am a separate, and entirely different person.

The ridiculous claims belong to you.

So I repeat: Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 1:20 pm

NEWS UPDATE: KATHLEEN RUGSENUGGER BREAKS HER VOW OF SILENCE

In a stunning new development, Kathleen Rugsenugger, who vowed not to respond to these posts, has recently offered testimony to the existence of Stacey and that Stacey is one person. However, critics have been quick to point out that no evidence was forwarded in support of Ms. Rugsenugger's claims. It has been stated by one credible source: "How in the HECK does she know that, unless, well, maybe, she's that one person she's claiming is Stacey?"

My indefatigable staff members have contacted a prominent psychologist at Hunt's College of Golf and has posed the question: Is it possible for one person to actually believe they are two separate persons? Professor Steven Mooseturd Stevarino states that "Yes, it is absolutely true. The split in personality develops from a strong self love." When asked for examples, the notable psychologist, whose specialty is "empirical differences between blacks and half-blacks," stated the following: "Yes, we see evidence of this all of the time. There have been extreme instances when a person will sit with two telephones or even two computers in front of them. They will enter in data simultaneously and then obsessively keep records for purposes of convincing others that they are not one and the same."

Another tendency of this extreme narcissism growing into split personality is when one or the other enters into dialogue with others and persistently comes to the defense of one's other "self." There may be others who are denied chocolate, but the split self will express absolute outrage only that his or her loved other has been deprived. "This is called narcissistic, hysteria, self defense of one's deeply loved other self," Professor Stevarino went on to claim. He continued: "The condition can become quite severe when one or the other of the split selves attempts to censor everyone around them. When this occurs, about the only remedy is laughter. Predictably, however, the split self-loving one is too immersed in self-infatuation to recognize any humor whatsoever."

We will attempt to provide more insight into this not so very fascinating topic in future news posts. Marv


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 13, 2012 at 1:42 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

So I repeat: Marvin, Forest, Mad as HECK, Tell everyone that you are a sh__disturber whose fantastical leaps have no bearing on reality.


Posted by Nurse Shark, a resident of Bridle Creek
on Dec 13, 2012 at 4:36 pm

You know, I can't take my eyes off this forum for a few weeks without Staceleen getting herself embroiled in another dust-up. Some people, it seems, are never able to grow up and take the high road. In fact, some people, it seems, are never able to log off of their computers. I wonder, Staceleen, if you might be happier if you rejoined the living world from time to time. Too much computer time isn't healthy.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 5:18 pm

An anonymous source who insists that we protect his/her identity has dropped this earth-shattering bomb shell: "There is something fishy going on in Ptown and I'm going to find out what the HECK it is." He is referring to the local scandal that currently engulfs all of Pleasanton's residents. To wit: Is Stacey one person or two?

It has been stated during our interview with a poster named Teddy that there is something uncanny about the way Stacey's and another person with a very different name share identical viewpoints on virtually every topic that has ever, ever been posted on the PW Forum. Yet another poster points out, "They rarely ever share the same cyberspace, so what in the HECK do you make of that?" S/He then continues: "And when they do show up together, they appear at precisely the same time. There was a point in time in late November when this occurred. So, what the HECK do you call it?"

Yet another bit of evidence came from Kathleen Rugsinuckle's proclamation that Stacey is a real person. But, say skeptics, how could Ms. Rugsinuckle voice such a proclamation without inside knowledge?

After commissioning my state-of-the-art investigative team, we have learned further that Stacey's impassioned defenses of Ms. Rugsinuckle are never devoted to other posters. We again reached Professor Steven Mooseturd Stevarino, a psychologist at Hunt's College of Golf and Plumbing, and he hypothesized that either Stacey and Ms. Rugsinuckle are indeed the same person OR that there exists a deep infatuation of one for the other which, ironically, would eventually fuse them into one single being. "This might be a case of obsessive cyber-doting developing into a case of manic fuseometricity that effectively makes two people one, even if in their own mind they remain two separate entities." The professor continued: "This might very well explain one's impassioned defenses of the other."

"A deeper problem may manifest itself should the one who is defending the "other" not feel reciprocation." "Do you mean," I asked, "like that Ms. Rugsinuckle never, ever reciprocates by coming to Stacey's defense?" "Exactly!" exclaimed the cerebral expert on self-loathing.

We intend to delve deeper into this matter, despite the excoriations that have been directed at us by the duo's attack side of itself.


Posted by Kathleen Ruegsegger, a resident of Vintage Hills Elementary School
on Dec 13, 2012 at 5:33 pm

Kathleen Ruegsegger is a registered user.

"Yet another bit of evidence came from Kathleen Rugsinuckle's proclamation that Stacey is a real person. But, say skeptics, how could Ms. Rugsinuckle voice such a proclamation without inside knowledge?"

Ya think?




Posted by Nomad, a resident of Another Pleasanton neighborhood
on Dec 13, 2012 at 7:18 pm

@Nurse - Seems it is Marvin and his ilk that can't log off their computers these days. And he is definitely not healthy.


Posted by Marvin, a resident of Parkside
on Dec 13, 2012 at 8:08 pm

STOP THE PRESSES: NEWS FLASH NO-he really truly isn't-MAD PROCLAIMS THAT MARVIN AND 'HIS ILK' ARE NOT HEALTHY

We have interrupted the above scintillating series of exchanges in order to inform all loyal readers that NO-he really truly isn't-MAD (just very sick) has proclaimed that Marvin "is definitely not healthy." What is most newsworthy about this contribution from the self-loathing one is that he was able to write an entire sentence without a single spelling error. Congratulations, NOMAD/Steve/Joe/AnnaS/Frank/Ethyl'sMom/Liberalismisadisease/mooseturd and all the other names where with your sickness rises like steam off a hot plop on a cold winter's morning.

In addition to his newly discovered spelling skills, NOMAD has also deemed himself in possession of expertise that permits him, nay requires him, to state the obvious: Marvin is not healthy. Of course this is true, for what other excuse might Marvin have to make a ninny of himself like NOMAD, Staceleen, and others do on a daily basis than to be bedridden by the flu? He quotes himself: "Yes, I haven't been able to do any serious writing for the past few days because I've been sick as a dog. Do you think I'd waste my time on this site were I in suitable health to do anything else?"

And with that, we'll now allow one and all of you to return to your full and interesting lives. Good night and good luck, Marvin


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