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Youth Sports

Original post made by Rosemary, Del Prado, on Aug 4, 2008

My experience with youth sports in Pleasanton is not a positive one. Baseball is controlled by parent group cliques who hand chose their children's teams. All Star teams are loaded with the children of the coaches and their friends who are not deserving. I'm considering taking my son out of baseball completely as his experience has been nothing but political. Can anyone tell me...will I experience the same political, clique climate in soccer of LaCrosse?

Comments (35)

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Posted by Brian
a resident of Del Prado
on Aug 5, 2008 at 8:24 am

Rosemary,

Maybe if you got involved and helped to coach, you could contribute to making baseball a more positive experience for your family.

Every sport is in desperate need of volunteers. I hate to see anyone badmouth volunteer coaches when they're all just parents out there trying to do their best.


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Posted by Agree
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 5, 2008 at 8:54 am

I agree with Brian. It amazes me sometimes how many parents show up for any team (I've coached all) whether its football, baseball, soccer or lacrosse and expect because they've paid thier league participation fee that all they need to do is show up. A couple of my observations over the years.

Regardless of the sport you will have some volunteers help simply for self serving purposes. Unless you get involved at the same level nothing will change. If you don't like policies that any league sport allows you can attend board meetings and make your observations known. You will also figure out quickly whether your opinion is in the majority or whether you are the only person involved in your complaint. I've actually experienced the most problems with soccer where in my experience once you son/daughter is classified as a certain type of player, breaking that mold is a very difficult challenge. Lacrosse has been the best experience, but as it gains a foothold of interest it to is beginning to experience some similar issues.

BTW, this is not at all a Pleasanton specific issue. Controlling and out of control parents are an epidemic in youth sports. It seems rediculous how many parents act as if world peace is at stake over a youth baseball or soccer game.

The NCAA has been running a great perspective ad for several years regarding student athletics. The quote of something like "Over 4 million college students participate in intercollegiate athletics, but most of them will ultimately go on to do something else in life". Great perspective that I believe many parents of kids need to adopt while thier kids are younger. Kids are way too pumped up at an early age for thier athletic accomplishments, and things get out of perspective quickly.


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Posted by Rosemary
a resident of Del Prado
on Aug 5, 2008 at 10:33 am

Thank you for the encouraging words. My husband did try to coach our son but was told all the positions were taken. We were encouraged to work the snack bar which we did. I also tried to get involved with the mothers on the team but found if you don't look a certain way, you are not going to be invited to the after game dinners. Maybe it was just the team I was involved with.


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Posted by Stacey
a resident of Amberwood/Wood Meadows
on Aug 5, 2008 at 10:38 am

After game dinners? Wow! All we ever did was head over to Thrifty's (now Rite-Aid) for square-topped ice cream!


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Posted by Much Happier
a resident of Pleasanton Middle School
on Aug 5, 2008 at 3:49 pm

Rosemary, I'm going to tell you something that many parents in Pleasanton would think is just plain crazy-there is life without baseball!
We did about every sport (soccer, baseball, softball, basketball, lacrosse, swimming and diving, ice hockey along with dancing and horseback riding) with our first two kids who were fairly good atheletes. My husband and I coached, car pooled, helped with fund raisers etc. We also spent nearly every Saturday for 10 years at some game or games and many weekday nights missing family dinners to drive them back and forth to practice. I'm sure the things you mention did go on but we were too busy to notice.
When our third child was old enough to start sports and the other kids were older and not as involved as when I noticed how "political" sports in this town can be-especially when your kid is not the team star. I coached and followed the rules but noticed that other teams seemed sometimes stacked with better and more popular players, and some began practice schedules earlier than allowed to get an edge on the season. It was frustrating to watch people get so serious about 5 and 6 year olds playing soccer.
As our youngest got older he realized that team sports (he tried most of them!) were just not for him, and now at twelve the only organized thing he does is summer swim league. He gets exercise with his skateboard, bike and scooter and spends the rest of his time playing with friends (building scooters and skateboards!), doing homework and enjoying special snow and wake boarding outings on our "free" Saturdays. Our new less hectic life is terrific and we are all much, much happier with our family time. It may not work for everybody-but Rosemary, there is life after baseball!


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Posted by Much Happier
a resident of Pleasanton Middle School
on Aug 5, 2008 at 3:49 pm

Rosemary, I'm going to tell you something that many parents in Pleasanton would think is just plain crazy-there is life without baseball!
We did about every sport (soccer, baseball, softball, basketball, lacrosse, swimming and diving, ice hockey along with dancing and horseback riding) with our first two kids who were fairly good atheletes. My husband and I coached, car pooled, helped with fund raisers etc. We also spent nearly every Saturday for 10 years at some game or games and many weekday nights missing family dinners to drive them back and forth to practice. I'm sure the things you mention did go on but we were too busy to notice.
When our third child was old enough to start sports and the other kids were older and not as involved as when I noticed how "political" sports in this town can be-especially when your kid is not the team star. I coached and followed the rules but noticed that other teams seemed sometimes stacked with better and more popular players, and some began practice schedules earlier than allowed to get an edge on the season. It was frustrating to watch people get so serious about 5 and 6 year olds playing soccer.
As our youngest got older he realized that team sports (he tried most of them!) were just not for him, and now at twelve the only organized thing he does is summer swim league. He gets exercise with his skateboard, bike and scooter and spends the rest of his time playing with friends (building scooters and skateboards!), doing homework and enjoying special snow and wake boarding outings on our "free" Saturdays. Our new less hectic life is terrific and we are all much, much happier with our family time. It may not work for everybody-but Rosemary, there is life after baseball!


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Posted by Less stress
a resident of Foothill High School
on Aug 6, 2008 at 1:39 pm

Much happier,

If I did not know better I would think I had written your post.
After more than a decade of Al Caffodio traveling soccer, "A" team basketball and all star baseball, year round high stress sports, our third son is enjoying only one team sport and all of the fun stuff kids should do.
Our quality of life has improved.

None of that stuff is what got our kids into their colleges.


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Posted by Liz
a resident of Foothill High School
on Aug 6, 2008 at 11:37 pm

Rosemary,
Preferrential treatment and manipulation of league rules seems to be the name of every game, no matter what the league, what the town. I'm raising boys and would have to say PFJL (thank you Dale, Joe & Sam) is the most morally correct league in town, Lacrosse would get second place. Unlike baseball, these are fast paced, contact sports so not necessarily the preference of a boy that enjoys baseball.

All the baseball leagues: Little League, Babe Ruth, Pony then Soccer: BUSC, Caffodio..over run by misguided adult sportmaniacs that need to get real in their lives. Few years ago there was an alcoholic, foul mouthed man "coaching" five (yes 5!) year olds at BUSC. He was so offensive, just as opponent, I couldn't/wouldn't imagine having him as a coach. I sent an early season email to BUSC, which I actually got a "we'll look into it" reply to. At the end of the season, I added negative comments again, as did most parents on our team to the league questionaire. I was shocked to hear he was coaching again the next season. I called a BUSC board member who candidly told me, "He had enough kids to form a team and turned in all the checks, so what could we do"? My response was, "Say NO, and why didn't you make it clear to him last season he wouldn't be welcomed back? Seems this league is about getting the checks, so remove us from your mailing list, our family is not interested in BUSC. After being on the "Board" of PNLL I walked away, the testosterone was gagging me!

"Much Happier" is right. There alot of options besides organized sports. It's easy for so many to drop their kids off, do nothing for the team/league and let it fall where it may, others form coach/asst. coach "alliances" sic and facilitate for their owns kids totally. I believe both to be examples of poor parenting. Be a good parent, explore your childs interests, look for passion, expose him to alot of different activities, snow skiing, water boarding, surfing, skim boarding, neighborhood swim clubs (swim is a great low impact exercise), Boy Scouts, rocket, archery, fencing, skate & game clubs. Think outside the box, we really do have a bigger and better variety to choose from!


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Posted by My 3 sons
a resident of Foothill High School
on Aug 7, 2008 at 11:28 am


Of all the sports my kids played baseball was by far the worst!!!!!!

My son turned down an opportunity to play on an allstar Little League team because of the coach.

Lacrosse has been the best.

It is heartbreaking when after years of developing their love for these sport, all of these kids get to the high schools and hundreds are turned away from the teams. Opportunity to play sports comes to an abrupt end.



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Posted by Real Life Lessons
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 8, 2008 at 11:27 am

Good or Bad, kids learn more real life lessons playing team sports than almost anything else they do in life. Regardless of the level that they play, the lessons are great. It bothers me that some parents would have thier kids miss out on these lessons based on a bad experience with one child.

How many families have 3 or 4 kids that can say they are so different that its amazing they are all raised by the same parents? To apply one rule for all situations is a mistake in any situation IMHO.


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Posted by DAD
a resident of Foothill High School
on Aug 8, 2008 at 12:18 pm

Real LL,

You miss the message many of us were saying, which is there is good and bad.

Keep it in perspective, don't get pulled into the all too consuming competition.

Sports are important to keep kids healthy and engaged but moderation is important to be healthy also.




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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 9, 2008 at 12:05 pm

Jeepers...I'm away for a few minutes and the fight is all about sports?
gimmeeeeeee a break...pew!


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Posted by Real Life Lessons
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 9, 2008 at 4:31 pm

Sorry DAD, Didn't realize you were the moderator/voice of reason and I wasn't etitled to my opinion.....

It seems some perspective is exactly what _you_ need.

I even finished my post with IMHO which stands for In My Humble Opinion in case you are not aware.


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 9, 2008 at 6:20 pm

Real Life Lessons is a sissy. That's why he's sooooooo driven. He can't help himself.

If you want a few tips re: enjoying life; I say take a flying leap!

And like I've often been told, go back to where you came from...underground where it is all fire and brimstone!

Begone Devil...


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Posted by Multi Sport
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 10, 2008 at 10:11 pm

Rosemary
You will find that many if not all sports are very political in nature as to which teams win each year, who makes the All Star teams, etc. The politics run from the board down to the managers and the key for those on the outside looking in is to get involved. Volunteer or run for a board position or coach/manager. Until new blood and ideas get in office you will continue to run in the obstacles you mention.


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Posted by RLL
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 11, 2008 at 8:27 am

Cholo,

Go back on vacation, it was "pleasant" without you.

Cholo is a bully, and talk about "hiding". Oh thats right YOU are the voice of authority and reason ;-) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 12, 2008 at 2:25 pm

RLL...you sure know how to crush a person!!! All I can say is that EVERYBODY in London thinks that I'm WAY COOL! HOORAY!

If you can't listen to the voice of reason, then talk to me!

Tee hee hee, tee hee hee...

Pssssssst...I'd like to know who the folks are on this thread that are Illegals? FESS UP MES PETITES...


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 12, 2008 at 2:34 pm

My fellow Americans, I plead with you not to allow your children to get involved with STEROIDS!

BASEBALL = STEROIDS!


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Posted by FWIW
a resident of Another Pleasanton neighborhood
on Aug 12, 2008 at 3:24 pm

Symptoms of manic phase of bi-polar disorder can include:

elation
short temper
changing from short temper to elation and back again very quickly
overactivity
being easily distracted
not sleeping
overeating
increase in sexual desire
moving very quickly from topic to topic in conversation, making it very difficult for others to keep up
speaking so quickly that it's difficult to understand all the words being said
having very grandiose ideas


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 13, 2008 at 2:06 pm

FWIW...you sure know how to copy a list correctly! Now, please explain what you mean by "bi-polar" disorder. Also, what phase of mania are you referring to? Is there ever a differential? What else could possibly mimic a manic presentation? Just asking...hmmmmmmmmmmmm...

You list means nothing, is there a context?


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 13, 2008 at 2:07 pm

Correction: Your list means nothing...


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 14, 2008 at 11:54 am

Dear Plutonians:
It's a disservice to provide information that leads you to conclude that a list of symptoms constitutes a diagnosis. In my opinion, FMIW has a simplistic understanding of diagnosis and expressing anger.

Diagnosis provides a protocol so that one can begin the process of understanding and providing treatment. In the process, there are always rule outs. In addition, disorders can mimic one another. That's why differential diagnosis is critical in caring for a patient.

I'm waiting for a response from FMIW so that we can further understand your intent in listing a laundry list of symptoms that imply that Cholo is mentally ill. tee hee hee, tee hee hee...I'm waiting FMIW...

Incidentally, my vacation was "pleasant" without you RLL...tee hee hee, tee hee hee...


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 14, 2008 at 12:01 pm

Correction: post is addressed to FWIW.
...is expressing anger...
...various disorders can mimic one another...

Lets play ball...catch the fly! HOORAY!

FWIW...EVERYBODY IN LONDON WAS WRAPPED UP WITH CHOLO...TEE HEE HEE, TEE HEE HEE...



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Posted by Doo Doo
a resident of Valley Trails
on Aug 14, 2008 at 12:44 pm

Wasn't this thread about Youth Sports?


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 14, 2008 at 2:00 pm

Hi there tidy bowl...you can thank FWIW for allowing personal hostility to get the upper hand! You're right, it WAS about youth sports! Play on...

Looking forward to a reasonable explanation FWIW...surprised that I understand clinical diagnosis and your diagnostic anger? tee hee hee, tee hee hee...


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Posted by RLL
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 15, 2008 at 9:46 am

How did Cholo exist for any period of time without a keyboard in front of him 24/7 tehehehhe.... It is interesting that someone _must_ have the last word on every subject ever written about.

Your comments Cholo in most cases are simply another form of graphiti. You are a bully with a keyboard.


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 15, 2008 at 11:36 am

Hey RLL, I have an electric keyboard that I can't play. Wanna buy it at a good price?


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Posted by RLL
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 15, 2008 at 5:11 pm

Stay on topic, learn to play "take me out to the ball game" tee hee hee hee hee hee.... Cholo be gone


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 15, 2008 at 10:34 pm

What a scream...there's a subject...hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahaha...
the BEAST IS AMONGST US...RUN FOR YOUR LIVES...BE GONE BEAST!!!


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Posted by stick to the topic
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 15, 2008 at 10:45 pm

The topic was what?
Politics in youth sports and the in justice caused by those who are deserving not getting what is due to them because they earned it
Stick to the topic at hand.


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 16, 2008 at 10:52 am

Say what? What injustice? What hand are you referring to? Left or right?

BASEBALL = STEROIDS, I rest my case!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


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Posted by Insane
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 16, 2008 at 2:18 pm

Cholo = INSANE I rest my case HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH


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Posted by stick to the topic
a resident of Amador Valley High School
on Aug 17, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Chloo do you have nothing better to do then make comments and provive opinions that make no sense and have nothing to do with the topic at hand? Your name fits your level of responses.


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Posted by Cholo
a resident of Livermore
on Aug 25, 2008 at 10:16 am

baseball is for the birds!

if you can't live and you can't die, make a list...


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Posted by Jeb Bing
editor of the Pleasanton Weekly
on Aug 25, 2008 at 2:12 pm

Jeb Bing is a registered user.

This topic has run its course. Thanks for posting.


Sorry, but further commenting on this topic has been closed.

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